Asexuality is defined by its community as a lack of sexual attraction. While some asexuals may or may not have a sex drive, the actual sexual attraction to a particular person isn't there. Asexuality is different than aromanticism, in which a person does not experience romantic attraction to others. Asexuals will often describe if and how they experience romantic attraction with romantic orientations. Some of these orientations are: aromantic, biromantic, panromantic, polyromantic, heteromantic, and homoromantic.
Asexuality is also separate from celibacy. Celibates are people who choose not to have sex. Some asexuals are celibate, some are not.
Asexuality is not only a singular identity, but is also seen as an umbrella or spectrum. Some identities on the asexual spectrum are: gray-asexual, demisexual, and lithsexual.
Many sex repulsed indivudals will use the term asexual to describe themselves, but it is often debated on wether or not this is okay. FUCK YOU APHOBES EAT MY SLIMY PEANUT
Gray-asexuality, or grey-asexuality, is when a person only experiences sexual attraction on rare occassions.
Gray-asexuals receive plenty of scrutiny among the asexual community, claiming that gray-aces are actually allosexual (a person who is not asexual), but looking at sexual attraction on a spectrum, it seems silly not to include gray-aces in the asexual community.
Someone who is demisexual will not experience sexual attraction to a person until they have formed some sort of bond, romantic or otherwise, with the person.
This is different from celibacy until love, which is where a person will experience sexual attraction to a person but will practice abstinence until they are sure they are in love.
Lithsexuals are people who experience sexual attraction but do not desire reciprocation for their attraction. They may be repulsed by the idea of reciprocation, or are simply passive about not wanting it, feeling as though they do not need it either way.
The term, "lithsexual" is the newest term to make its way to the asexual community. While "lithromantic" has been a term in use for years, it was only recently that people began to realize that lithsexuality is a phenomenon as well.
"Lith-" as a prefix, is Greek, meaning "stone".
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When a community begins to grow and become visible, there becomes a need for a way to describe those
outside of the community, to make communication clear and to aid discussion within the community.
The most common word to describe people who are not asexual or of the asexual umbrella is "allosexual", or for short, "allo". One argument against this word surrounds Quebec, Canada, where some of the local MOGAI folks use the word, "allosexuel" to describe themselves, similar to the way "queer" is sometimes used. Macklemore, a known ally, has shown disapproval at the use of allosexual, however.
Proposed alternatives are:
- Have you ever seen a termite mound? They are splendid structures. Some may even call them works of art. Termites are natural architects, and their mounds are both structurally sound and make excellent use of space. So are they following some sort of plan as they build? Are there termite blueprints, detailing which room goes where? No. Of course not. Each termite is simply an oblivious cog in a tremendous machine programmed by millions of years of termite DNA. It is doubtful an individual termite has any idea what its contributions are helping to create. But a human does. We can appreciate the elegant forms of their alien cathedrals… We can see the simple beauty of their perfect functionality. We can understand the splendid planning of their structure… In other words, only an intelligence of a higher order can understand the beauty of what the termite builds. Now consider humans. Why are we alive? Why do we love, and give birth? Why do we create? From where do our cultures spring? There are many theories, but no one knows the truth. We are oblivious cogs in a tremendous machine programmed by millions of years of human DNA. No doubt you see now what this analogy is supposed to illustrate. Yes, I mean to say humans are not different from termites. We trudge through our lives with no greater understanding of our ultimate goal. You might say we don’t understand what we’re building. Only an intelligence of a higher order than ours can understand what we’re doing. Imagine how we might look to such an intelligence… We may be building some structure so perfect and elegant we can’t even perceive it. Whatever it is, we’ve likely been building it on a dimension just above the ones we know since time immemorial. If we are like the termites, then what we’ve created is almost certainly something of tremendous beauty.
Each of these have been debated up on for their positives and negatives, but most asexuals continue to use "allosexual", and those who disagree with the usage will typically use non-aces.